True Confessions...

I suppose it's time for me to come clean; to acknowledge my shortcomings. I hope you can understand how difficult this is for me to share!

My sad tale...

In springtime I commented on a Facebook post from my favorite actor (along with hundreds of other folks). I was astonished when I got a reply from him thanking me for my support. I seriously questioned his identity because I thought it very unlikely that he would actually be responding to comments on Facebook. We had a conversation back and forth where I thanked whomever was having the conversation with me, but he assured me that it was in fact himself. We exchanged a few basic platitudes but then the conversation got interesting. He asked my age, which is very common in Korea. They need to know if you are older or younger so they use the correct grammatical voice. I explained I was a grandmother. He indicated that age wasn't really important but I protested that and explained my interest in Kdramas flirts on the voyeuristic edge. This banter went back and forth a bit and was rather exciting....I am a grandma after all.

This conversation took place over several days and as time passed would be instigated more often than not by him instead of me. Again, I questioned his true identity as the conversation was certainly taking some effort. But it was so fun! Imagine getting a personal message daily from your heartthrob... Yes! He cares! He's interested! Be still my heart. I shared this excitement with my friends and family, who were supportive....but skeptical.

So... this continued for perhaps a week. Naturally I was excited and flattered to have a personal connection to this famous actor but slowly my bubble began to deflate. I just couldn't wrap my mind around a Kdrama Idol communicating with me. So I decided I needed to get confirmation.

I very politely asked if he would provide a phone number so that I could FaceTime and SEE him in the flesh to confirm. Of course he declined saying his agency wouldn't permit that. My next option was to request him to videotape himself and send that to me saying something like 'Hi Judy.'

At that point his true colors came through. He said my request was 'an embarrassment’ & he ‘couldn't take the doubting any more’....'and why would I let someone divide us'... and that I was ‘acting like a child.'

Good grief. Pop went my fantasy! So I reluctantly wished him bad Karma and blocked him...

Since then my life has become rather dull. I no longer look forward to tantalizing conversations with 'my guy'.... my heart has returned to its normal level... I no longer rush to check messages on Facebook or Instagram (that's not exactly true. I still look at them). In short, I am bereft.

Favorite daughter recently told me that if I wanted to reach out to him again to resume the conversation she'd be okay with that.... so long as I understood it was totally fake. I feel certain we were about at the stage where he was going to ask for a pre-paid gift card from Walmart. <sigh>